Guilt Free Mum

Something you don't often hear about but is tied to being a parent, is feelings of guilt. I can pretty much guarantee that every time I get together with any of my mom friends, one or all of us will at some point say, "I feel so bad that..." or "I feel like the worst mum because..." I have many of these thoughts pretty much on a daily basis. I feel guilty that my kids don't eat better, that I don't do enough crafts with them, that I don't read to them more, and that I don't spend more time just playing with them. For 18 months I felt guilty that I couldn't figure out what Lincoln needed to be able to sleep, knowing how important sleep is for growth and development. I previously felt guilty for not taking better care of myself, and now that I do, I feel guilty when I go for a run while the kids are awake. And the list goes on.

Recently, a friend was talking about her childhood and it made me realize how ridiculously hard I am being on myself. It made me realize I need to start focusing on all the things I am doing for my kids and stop beating myself up for the things I don't have time for. My kids are loved....so loved! They have two parents that love and respect them, as well as each other.We spend as much time as we can with them reading, playing, baking, building forts, and going on adventures. And most importantly they have a home, a real home. A safe haven. A place they are loved unconditionally. When they come home they are happy to be there. And when Dan or I come home they are always excited to see us and tell us about their day. It may not seem like a lot, but it is. Not every child has a home like that, even though they should. Not everyone is surrounded by that much love.

Feeling guilty can sometimes be good. It can get us to do, give, and be a little better. But when those feelings of guilt just make us feel like we are failing as mothers, when it couldn't be further from the truth, it doesn't do anyone any good. So going forward I am making a commitment, and I hope my mom friends will do the same, to focus on all the things we are doing for our kids. We will all still want to do more but let's do what we can and realize that raising children, especially little ones, is all consuming and we are doing the best we can with the time we have.

After all, these two look pretty well taken care of to me!