A Couple Thorns

Just to make it clear that things aren't all sunshine and roses over here, I thought I would talk about some of our harder adjustments with a new family member!

For me it's the obvious, lack of sleep! When I had Carter I felt tired from the broken sleep but I've never felt exhaustion like I have over the last month. I'm so tired that many days my whole body aches. At times I've cried at just the thought of having to get up to get myself a drink. My body is just not use to such little sleep!

Carter was a dream sleeper (and still is). Our first night home with him, Dan and I both got 9 hours sleep. It was broken into 3 hour chunks but it was still 9 hours. And it continued like that until he started sleeping longer and longer, getting up to 12-13 hours straight a night. To this day he still sleeps 11-12 hours straight. We had a few tiring nights due to teething or sickness but over all they were few and far between.

Lincoln on the other hand is no where near being a dream sleeper. That being said, he's not a bad sleeper, he's just a normal newborn sleeper. He usually gets one good chunk of sleep (3-5 hours) but then they go to 2 hour chunks and every other night or so I'm up with him for 2+ hours at a time. I have occasionally asked Dan to take over when Link is fed and just not sleepy, but Dan's been watching Carter all day, every day (and Link too when I try to nap) so for the most part I'm on my own at night. Now that Dan's back at work it's a little harder because my only chance for a nap is if I can get both kids to nap at the same time, which is not an easy task!

The other contributing factor to my exhaustion is breastfeeding. Anyone that has done it knows how hard and tiring the first few weeks can be while your supply is catching up. It's almost non stop nursing. Luckily, Link is starting to get on a three hour schedule which is doing a lot for my sanity. Until the next growth spurt that is! And the other plus is that it eventually becomes easier then the alternative since it's always there and ready! Not to mention all the health benefits for both of us that make it worth it no matter what!

Since Dan has gone back to work this week I've started to really see how life has changed for Carter. Before Lincoln was born Carter had our attention almost all the time. And when we were at work, he had gramma or papa here. He has always been fine playing on his own if we were cleaning or cooking but other then that we have been almost constant entertainment for him.

The good news is, although we definitely have our moments (tantrums and tears like never before), for the most part he is adjusting really well. He is eating at the table, sometimes by himself for breakfast or lunch, without someone reading to him. He's playing on his own a lot while I'm nursing or comforting Lincoln. And yesterday he played in the backyard by himself (while I watched from the kitchen). I think the last one was harder on me then him but in the end I got to see the benefits of his new found freedom. He managed to get toys out of the deck box that previously required our assistance, he bumped his head without a tear (what's the point if there is no one there to kiss your boo boo), and he managed to get himself unstuck from his play house window. So in the end, as hard as it may be, I really see these adjustments as good ones for Carter. I think it will give him more independence and confidence. Lately if I'm feeding Lincoln, and Carter throws something, I will threaten to take it away but he says "I take it away" and he throws the toy in the laundry room and shuts the door!

And last but not least, is poor Pancho! He loves Carter and Link but he's not a fan of losing a lot of his attention. After Carter was born Pancho started sighing a lot. His sighs have increased since Lincoln was born. When Carter came home from the hospital Pancho would run to his room when he cried the first few weeks. He has never done that for Link. And one night when Link was sleeping with us and started crying Pancho jumped off the bed and in to a chair in our room to sleep, which he had never done before. Poor doggy!

All in all, I think these are just regular adjustments going from one child to two. As exhausted as I am it is all worth it! I wouldn't trade my life and family for a thing!

I mean, who wouldn't want one of these...

What Being a Mother Means to Me!

In the spirit of Mother's Day, I thought it was a good day to reflect on what being a mother means to me. Believe it or not, some of my views have changed just in the last month. When they say every kid is different they sure aren't lying. What worked for Carter doesn't work for Link.

Just like every adult learns, acts, and reacts differently to things, so do children. I think this is the most important lesson I've learned over the last two and a half years. It's so important to learn your child's strengths, weakness', and quirks. And it's not about fixing them, it's about working with them and teaching our children how to do the same!

To me, being a mother also means...

*trusting your instincts
*putting your children first
*putting yourself first sometimes too (hello "me" time!)
*you are a fool to not accept help when offered
*hugs and kisses whenever you want, at least for now!
*losing sleep, a lot of it!
*swearing as you get out of bed at 3am and then feeling more love then you can handle two seconds later when you walk in to your child's room and see them
*reading advise from experts and then forgetting 80% of it because it doesn't work for you...on to the next book!
*being a helicopter parent
*trying not to be a helicopter parent
*smiling and nodding every time someone assumes every whimper your child makes means they are hungry
*having the magical power to fix boo-boo's with just a kiss
*never ending worry
*never ending love

There's probably a million more I could come up with but it's literally taken every free second today, and not free second (I'm nursing right now), to write this so that will have to do!

Oh, and *being very very busy ALL the time!

Updates

Well, some day I'll have time to post again. For now I'll just give a quick update on us all for those interested!

Lincoln is doing great! He's nursing like a champ and growing like a weed! The first two weeks he seemed to have his nights and days mixed up but the last two nights he has spent most of the night sleeping. I'm trying baby wearing more this time so Link gets to be close and I still get to get some things done (like this post!) He loves it as he's not a fan of me putting him down anywhere right now. I love it too!

I am recovering well. The first week was rough but I have felt better each day since then. Unfortunately I had a mystery bump on my stomach that turned out to be muscle distension. Basically, the muscles in my abdomen split and unfortunately one side is slightly herniated. So I get to look about 4 months pregnant until I can work the muscle out "a lot, a lot, a lot" (per the OB) or I end up having to have surgery. Not thrilled but it gives me more motivation to work out. Now I just need to find the time and energy! For now, while I'm supposed to take it easy, I'll just focus on spending time with my boys.

Carter is adjusting well to life with a sibling. He is still sleeping through the night (which is a blessing) and being as sweet as ever. He doesn't seem to notice that I haven't lifted him since Lincoln was born but I think it helped that I couldn't lift him much before either. He also seems okay with the fact that I have to feed and hold Link a lot. I'm sure it helps that Dan's been home so he's had a lot of attention from daddy. I'm actually in the process of writing another post about Carter and Link so I'll leave the rest of Carter's update for that.

Dan is still off work for another week (another blessing!), though I think he might be secretly looking forward to going back to work. Because of the c-section he is still having to do pretty much everything around the house and he does it without a single complaint! He's the best husband and father we could ask for!

That's it for now. Someone woke up and is hungry!